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As Arjay stepped through the dimension door he’d cast from Belle’s apartment, he took a moment to let out a deep sigh. When he’d grown in power, when he finally began to reside in the celestial planes with Sune and his peers, he firmly intended to make his part of the plane resemble this. Something about the inn and its energy just made him relax, even when it was closed down for the night and the lights were out. Right now, he needed that comfort. The problems that he’d just walked away from had only been going on for a few spare minutes, true, but it had left the fledgeling god soul-weary after the events from the past few weeks of his life that he still hadn’t recovered from. Hopefully, the rest of the night would prove to be some sort of balm for those spiritual scars.
Ascending the stairs to his bedchambers, though, he found himself pausing in the doorway. He’d expected (based on the note he’d been given not very long before) see Sune’s red tresses spread over the bed and her body curled up with the tiny form of their daughter. Instead, Hanali's golden hair practically lit up the room from where she sat holding the baby and looking none too pleased.
Wonderful.
Wordlessly and wearily, Arjay walked over, carefully extricating his daughter from her mother's arms. He slowly lay down on the bed, resting the sleeping infant on his chest and slowly stroked his fingers down her back, lulling her more deeply into sleep. “I'm sorry that my return is so long in coming, my love,” he sighed. “Incidentally, when next you're in Arvadandor, tell Shevarash that only cowards strike from ambush, and that ambushing someone who bears you no ill is a move that Lolth would particularly approve of.” Perhaps things would progress better if he came in contrite, but he was far too drained for that much self-abuse to come naturally right now.
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Hanali had no desire to surrender her child, even to the father- not at this moment when she was so hurt from his actions. She gave a deep sigh however, and loosed the grip on the sweet thing who had curled into her arms so sweetly as she drifted to sleep. Though Hanali did not wish to- she would not put Mel'inde in the middle of a struggle between her mother and father. Hanali may not have held infants in such esteem as Sune did- but Mel'inde wasn't just any infant. She was Hanali's. Hazel eyes, copper hair, she cared little. What mattered was the spark behind Mel'inde's beautiful gaze that matched her mother, no matter her form.
Hanali's perfect countenance was ruined with the soft furrow of her brow, the tight line of her lips. She turned her eyes to Arjay for only a moment before turning to the window. "You hurt that girl, Arjay." Was the extent of what she managed, her tone heavy with sorrow and simple exhaustion. "You allowed love to take root in her that you would never be able to bring to it's proper bloom."
Hanali wiped at stubborn tears, not knowing how to put into words her sadness. She knew Arjay had meant no ill. But she also knew that he had acted against so many tenements of her faith that he had held so faithfully, for so long. It was a betrayal- thought she knew he didn't mean it as such. It still left her an ache she could not explain.
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Dungeons and Dragons-Forgotten Realms
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At her accusation, it was like the still-raw scar on his chest flared with fresh pain. Was that in his head? Was his power giving him a good smack for his sins? He really wasn’t sure. He was fairly sure that she wasn’t making it happen, of course… Perhaps this is just what happened when a god had a righteous reason to feel guilt.
“I’m aware,” he said, the voice in his catch having nothing at all to do with that physical discomfort. “The fact was made indelibly clear to me in the moment. Even more, I couldn’t make it right. I would have taken the memory from her, as much of her regard for me as I could have, but her mind is protected, and is far too stubborn to accept that this isn’t a condemnation of her.” He rubbed the bridge of his nose, not really feeling like taking on any self-flagellation at the moment, but unable to avoid the feelings of regret that were coloring his entire day now. It was true what they said, you can do do nearly everything right, but what is going to define your view of yourself will be that one thing you did wrong. He’d done what he could to set the situation on a better path, and he knew she knew that. There was literally nothing he could do further for the situation. “I’m sorry,” he said, and he found that he’d never been able to say the words so sincerely before. “If you wish me to go again, I will.” Goddess knew he didn't feel like he deserved her regard right now, even if there was a part of him that didn't feel he deserved to be villainized for this.
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Hanali wished to be filled with righteous anger. To channel her emotions into violence, bring a swift and just end to the pain in her heart. Yet she knew that losing Arjay would hurt too much. Though his actions today made her fear that he had already strayed too far from her, she would not accelerate his departure.
She allowed a few tears to stream from her eyes, a quick breath all that she needed in order to wipe them away. She turned back to him, brow still furrowed. Hanali's full pink lips parted slightly as she went to speak- before she changed her mind and closed her mouth once more.
Hanali climbed into bed beside her beloved. Not knowing what to say. Not knowing whether to Condemn him, or Console him.
With a deep sigh, she did offer advice finally. "You are god of heartbreak, Beloved. You know better than any that forgetting such an ache is not the best way to go about recovering from one." Turning to lie on her side, rather than stare up at the ceiling as she had, she reached forward to brush through her daughter's curls.
His apology was all that she needed. Her relief in knowing that he did regret his actions, and he knew that he had hurt Hanali as well-
She leaned forward to kiss his temple before golden hair melted into red curls. Sune opened her eyes slowly, worry now all that coloured her expression.
She reached out to cup Arjay's chin, turning his head towards her. She pressed her forehead against his. "I am sorry that it hurt you as well."
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Dungeons and Dragons-Forgotten Realms
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He really, really wished that her explanation was why he hadn’t taken the memories from her, but they both knew it wasn’t. “Perhaps. All I really wanted to do was to bring her… back from the edge. Just do a few minutes over, make the intelligent choice instead of the amorous one. Instead…” He sighed, shaking his head.
Arjay hoped that, in the ages to come when he had more aspects (if he ever did), he’d understand this switching and changing moment to moment. He supposed that if she was melting back into Sune, then there was no longer an aspect of her that was out of accord regarding him? If that was how it worked, he’d take it. He let out a deep breath, leaning his forehead against hers, kissing her lightly. “It was a good lesson,” he said. “At the very least, compared to some of the things that have happened to me of late, it was a much… cleaner pain, if that makes any sort of sense.” He glanced down at his chest, gingerly brushing his fingers over the tender scar still there. “I suppose this adds character,” he mused, shrugging. “The worst part of it was really that I was completely unable to convince her that this was about what I did to her and not what I was supposedly doing to you.” He let out an exasperated breath, finally letting himself process some of that frustration. “Honestly, I don’t think that anything short of you personally pulling her into our bed would convince her, and even that I have doubts about, as enticing a prospect as it might be.”
The elf took a deep breath and allowed himself to just sink into the feeling of being with his family again, the thing he’d missed above all others this past month. “I hope that for my first little outing as a true divine power on Toril, I didn’t disappoint you too badly,” he said. From the perspective of pure divine power, the trip had been a net positive, naturally. He’d nearly doubled his divine power, even after the bits of Keptolo’s power that he’d rejected and hidden away. Among the Drow, he’d found a people that really did need the gospel he spread, which some might call cheating when one was trying to gather power, but he just called it compassion and practicality. He’d escaped with his life, which sealed that victory. From the perspective of his portfolio, he’d done fairly well also. His attention was being called nightly by new worshippers, particularly the priestess that he’d stolen from Lolth who was now called to walk a very lonely road and would need his support. However, he’d also clashed with several powers that wanted to destroy him and had been attacked by a member of his own race’s pantheon of gods, so the chance that he’d made a mistake was also reasonable. It was a sign of his newness to his status, he supposed, that he did still need reassurance from his love and patroness regarding his actions… although perhaps the latest mess he’d just walked away from had something to do with that as well. He needed to know that not everything he did was horrible, after all.
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Sune hummed lightly in reply. She understood the desire to erase the hurt. To wipe your touch away from something beautiful, being too close to see the hand print you left in proper reference to the full tapestry of the heart. In the position of being able to see almost nothing except the dark ugly mark you had left on someone. She also had seen that full and rich tapestry many times. There were no ugly marks. Ragged ones, raw ones, open sores- certainly. But nothing ugly. It just became a part of the beautiful whole.
She held her tongue rather than pour out pretty poetry that would mean little to him while he still hurt. Maybe one day she'd draw the woman's heart for her beloved. Let him see the mark he had left beside all the others that adorn it.
It was rarely so clearly drawn that her aspects switched- Sune held the controlling reins so it was admittedly odd for Hanali to make the change- but usually the life of a Goddess was too convoluted for such simplicity. This however was one of the rare times where Hanali's feelings so over powered Sune that there was no choice to the matter. It was only when she accepted his apology and allowed her hurt to fade that Sune was able to re-emerge.
So- in this one rare instance, he was right in assuming the change signaled her aspects no longer in conflict about her feelings.
She followed his lips eagerly- perhaps the situation had muddied the feelings- but she did miss him greatly while he was gone. She followed the movement of his hand to the scar, pressing a light kiss to the skin there, taking his hand in her own. She chuckled despite herself. "It likely doesn't help that I nearly set her drapery on fire when I got angry. She was well meaning enough when I spoke to her- but she still dared suggest that she knew better than I about our relationship. She did not intend insult, I believe, but she thinks of me like a mortal woman who cannot see your heart." She offered with a huff.
"I understand that divinity is a foreign concept to most mortals and there are things beyond their comprehension, but the idea that I would not be able to tell if my love were hurting you is outright offensive." She mumbled, the ends of her curls flicking with sparks as the memory drudged up her frustrations.
It seemed the pair shared a lack of patience when compared to the mortal woman's capacity to be stubborn even when very wrong. Perhaps especially then.
She chuckled at his words, moving to pull Arjay's head to tuck under her own. "You did wonderfully, my love. And I'm quite proud of your strategy. Too many new deities fall into the hole of searching only for worship among those already in favour with their patron. Not only did you avoid such a mistake, but you brought light to those who needed it. Just as you were meant to." She pressed a kiss into his hair. "I have heard new prayers of late- ones intended for me,
but with fond regard for my moonlight touched mate." She whispered, brushing her fingers through his silver locks. "You have begun to make waves."
Her eyes turned thoughtful as her words finished. The world of deities needed such a shake up- though it remained to be seen whether or not it would be for the better or worse. So long as her beloved and their daughter were safe, she would accept most any result.
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Dungeons and Dragons-Forgotten Realms
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Yes, Arjay had to agree with Sune: Belle was a particularly frustrating case. He really wished he could have a few choice words (or even just questions) with the gods of her world, because the way they were running things was simply absurd in some respects. Perhaps there was a good reason behind it, but it was not one that was visible within Arjay's limited scope. "Sometime, probably soon," Arjay sighed, "She will find her happiness, and it will feel all the more happy because of the losses she's felt. Much more than if she'd known nothing but joy these past years. She doesn't have the patience for that lesson, though, much as I'd be willing to explain it, even if I'm explaining it to explain my life and joy to her."
He smiled at her touch, feeling unknown tensions melt out of his body, but resisted the urge to turn toward her because he didn't want to wake their daughter. He was making waves... "I'm rather worried that the campaign I have in mind will draw the ire of more of the gods of my family than just Shevarash. I'm an upstart power, while he's had centuries to establish himself. I'm seeking a large amount of my power out in the Underdark, which will inevitably require me to have dealings with less savory powers than those I've dealt with yet. While you know my heart like no other, I worry that his words will sway other opinions toward me." In particular, he had the idea that he wasn't going to pursue Vhaeraun's ire like others might. He chuckled humorlessly, shaking his head. "What does it say about me that on being raised to divinity, I haven't tried to join the pantheon I worshipped in my mortal life?" He had his own ideas, of course: That he was simply fed up with the politics of elven superiority came to mind immediately. Also, the insular nature of his people was not going to suit him. "There is... something stirring," he said. "It's not something I could have felt before, but now that I'm tied to the spirit of Toril... something is approaching, though I know not what. I fear that I need to move quickly and make whatever alliances I can, because when I'm in Toril I cannot free myself from the idea that they'll be needed soon."
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Sune would deny to any other the snort she gave at the understatement of the other redhead's mortal impudence. It was an unflattering sound, and she had no desire to appear to be less than perfect- but it was Arjay. And Belle really did have no patience. "Well, my love. One day she will be old enough to understand. At that time we can stick our tongues out at her or whatever expression of fond annoyance we choose, and point out to her what we have been trying to tell her all along."
Sune smiled softly and propped herself up such that she could match his gaze.. She just met his eyes for a moment, and traced the contours of his skin. Sune allowed her love to envelop her, to the point where when she leaned down to kiss his forehead, her affection would buzz along his flesh as well. She continued her appreciation. Laying not one, but two kisses over each eye, one on his nose, enough to cover his jawline and cheek bones- and then she claimed his mouth once more for her own. Sune savoured the simple brush of his soft lips against her own for a long moment before she gave him another smile and tucked his head under hers once more. "Sleep for now, my love. And simply allow your mind to fill with the warmth of our family. Whatever is coming is not yet here, and I wish to have a moment to treasure with you."
@arjay
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Dungeons and Dragons-Forgotten Realms
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Old enough to understand? “Love, you do remember that humans barely live past infancy,” he said dryly, “If we’re waiting for time to push mysteries of the heart past her stubbornness, we may have met an obstacle that will invariably defeat us.” Yes, he was going to give voice to his frustrations here, in this safest of places for his opinion. “Some day, I would welcome the chance to speak with the gods of her world, because they seem to preach very… odd principles where love is concerned. It’s akin to a starving man refusing to eat the bread he’s offered because he was told he should enjoy only the finest royal feasts.”
As she leaned over him, Arjay’s eyes closed in appreciation of the tender ministrations she was bestowing on him. “I’ve come back through the darker parts of Toril, too far separated from you. My weariness isn’t of the body, Love, though it occasionally feels like it. Perhaps I’m catching my own stubborn streak, but I’m loathe to spend my first hours returned to you in sleep.” He did, however, slowly rise from the bed, cradling the baby close to his chest as he walked over to her nearby cradle. He held his hand up in the air, then drew it down, weaving his fingers in a complicated, repetitive pattern as they went. In the air, the golden divine light he still drew from her wove with that violet fire he wielded so well, smoothing themselves out into a white blanket that he wrapped the child in as he lay her down. “Sleep now, little one,” he murmured, leaning down to kiss one tiny, rosy cheek, before returning to the bed where his lover awaited him. She wished to not worry about the future, which was so completely in line with her nature that he couldn’t bring himself to be surprised. And he would indulge her that wish, of course. It was his nature to guard them against the future, this was one of those roles he filled amongst her and her servitor gods that their flighty nature prevented them from truly embracing. If it fell to him to prepare for the future in their stead? Well, so be it.
“If it’s a treasure you wish, my love, I can only hope to give you something befitting your own regal nature,” he said, his tone teasing but his words eve true.
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