Home Calendar Help
Information Chat
Rating: 3-3-3

Word Count: None

Fandoms: All

Canons: Open/Oc's Welcome!

Bans: Howard the Duck,
RPF* Real Person Fiction; IE Apping an actual celebrity

Main Rule:Don't Be a Dick

OOC min age:18


Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Shattered Glass
Tag: 616 Tony | Aug 5th
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#1
So his life had taken a turn. Christian was used to things going ways other than how he planned, he was, but this? The mess at the Goddess had been a disaster. He had watched his very carefully put together life shatter and come crashing down around him, and he’d felt the cuts as the pieces had rained down on him. Cuts. One word for it. Another word was gashes. Giant, gaping gashes furrowed into him, because that’s what his chest felt like right now; like someone had taken jagged pieces of broken glass and raked then down his chest, right into his heart.

It hurt. It hurt more than he’d been able to imagine. Not just the betrayal from Jaya, a supposed friend. Someone he had trusted enough to talk to, to really talk to, to go to bed with. But also the unequivocal rejection from Safi, in the form of simply writing off what Jaya had said and pretending it meant nothing.

Well, let’s face it, probably not really pretending.

Christian hadn’t had a good night’s sleep since the turn of the month, and he was beginning to feel run down. He needed to do something to get himself through this mess. Safi was still there, still exactly as he’d been before, and that was something, right? His life hadn’t shattered entirely, just the bits on his side, those pieces that had held his illusion of being fine with how things were. Because Chris knew he wasn’t okay. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore; he had no sand left to bury his head in, and looking back at the past few months, well… He’d sort of been an ass, hadn’t he?

He had known while he’d been doing it that he was doing the wrong thing, being unkind and mistreating people. Mostly, he’d been unbelievably unfair to Mr. Stark. Yes, the man wasn’t the person Christian had expected, hoped, he would be. He had lived a far different life from what the comic books had portrayed, and while that stung deeply, it hadn’t earned Tony the treatment that Chris had given him.

He’d been terribly jealous, and that was his problem, not Mr. Stark’s, to deal with.

So. New day, new leaf, new attempt to find a way to...cope...with this situation. Because Christian needed to find a way to cope with this. To deal with it. He needed to pick the glass shards out of his heart and stitch everything up and move forward. Heal.

Which was why he was here in Mr. Stark’s mansion, an old, well loved and carefully, lovingly, crafted automaton. Iron Man, not as he was now, but how he had been over a decade ago, when Christian had been a boy, just learning how to build things well. The first thing he had made? Had imitated? Iron Man. He clutched it gingerly, but almost possessively, as he knocked on the door to Tony’s office. Chris didn’t enter until he’d been bid to do so, and then he walked in quietly, shutting the door behind him with a soft click and moving to set the old toy down on the desk before Tony. It was heavy, but it was well crafted by someone who had taken time with it, to make sure they got everything right, and the reproduction of the old armor was exact, even the scale was accurate.

Christian had worked hard on the toy, and he had been dedicated. This one had never been alive, and had always been one of his very favorites, rating up there with Jonah for being so loved. “I owe you an apology.” The words were spoken quietly, but with sincerity, “I’ve been unfair to you, in how I treated you, and I’m sorry for that.” Chris shifted, his eyes had been focused on the toy, but now he moved to look at Tony, “You asked me my favorite part about reading about you, and I answered.. Poorly. Not dishonestly, but… I choose my words poorly. I was angry, and I was lost and… And it doesn’t matter because there’s no excuse, but I’m sorry. You aren’t who I had expected, and I don’t know how to relate to you because of that, because of the differences between the fictional hero and the person I met. But I shouldn’t have treated you badly.”

Chris fidgeted, because he was nervous, enough to show it, but he fell silent now, letting Tony have the chance to speak and have his say.
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#2
Tony had been in his office going through recent SE numbers. Technically, it was all in his head via Extremis, which made the use of an office and desk unnecessary. But he'd always liked his old mansion office and in any case, there was something to be said for a little solitude and privacy.

Until he got a knock on the door. Wondering who it could be, Tony cleared the Extremis data streams from his eyes and bid the person enter.

He'd been expecting Wanda, or Steve, or Safi. Certainly not Chris, clutching what appeared to be a well-loved Iron Man toy.

Which he plunked down on the mahogany desk as he began talking. Tony's practiced eye could see that it was a near-perfect scale replica of the Mark 12.

It was only the surprisingly heartfelt apology that had him looking up from the toy to the other man's face. Now there was another surprise. In the intervening weeks he'd almost forgotten that Chris had brought up Tony's lonely childhood or that he'd brushed off what had seemed like an attempt to unsettle him with a lie. But apparently the smaller man hadn't. The rest of it left him nonplussed. He'd been aware that Chris disliked him, but considering that the level of his vitriol didn't even come close to that of most people who disliked him, he hadn't given that much thought either. He certainly hadn't been waiting for an apology.

"That's a nice toy," Tony said, his eyes flicking back down to the toy on the desk, then back up to Christian's face. He wasn't about to open up more about his past without a reason to do so. He also wasn't going to dismiss the apology until he better understood it, not when Chris had been so hateful towards him from the beginning. Instead he asked, "What were you angry about?"
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#3
Tony might not have been expecting an apology, but Christian hadn’t been able to help but feel as though he owed one to the other man. Even before things had blown up at the Goddess between him and Safi, Christian had known he was doing wrong by the genius; he just hadn’t been able to make himself come and do the right thing, hadn’t been able to make himself change things.

Right now, he was very aware that Tony Stark wasn’t going to be going anywhere any time soon. Safi liked him, this was a thing, and Christian… Christian needed to accept it. He needed to make his peace, and hold onto it, because this was what his life was, and what it was going to continue to be for the foreseeable future, regardless of how he felt about it, or what he wanted.

And what he wanted was for the hurting to stop.

That was unlikely, but he could try to make things right with Mr. Stark. Try to improve their relationship so things would be easier.

He had brought his toy from home because he thought maybe it would help if Tony saw, had proof, of how Chris had always seen him. Of what he had meant to him as a kid. Mr. Stark called it nice, and Chris blinked, looking to the toy as he shrugged a little, “It’s alright… It works, mostly, though I had problems making the legs move right; they were always a little too stiff, but he still works when you wind him, so…” It was all true, even if the little robot moved better now. It had taken Chris years to find the tiny offending servo and replace it in order to make him move smoothly enough, but now the little figure could take a few steps forward before ‘falling’ forward into Tony’s signature crouch as he ‘landed’ and standing back up to repeat the process.

”What were you angry about?”

At the question, Christian winced, his facing screwing up, not in anger this time, but hurt, and he shook his head, looking down, “Nothing that was your fault. I was…” He shrugged, “My sister was missing, and I was lost in a new place, and...scared…” And Safi had stopped to flirt with his childhood hero, and… All of that. Plus things he wasn’t comfortable admitting even just to himself. “I should have been grateful you were willing to help. I should have been thrilled to meet you. Instead, I was… Unkind and short tempered.”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#4
Tony watched with mild bemusement as the toy did its thing. Christian had obviously put some effort into making it work. Tony felt a mild pang of guilt at how he'd brushed off the other man's interest in his being Iron Man when they'd first met. But even if Chris had been sincere, there was something about a complete stranger knowing all about his early life that was...unsettling. While he knew, of course, that as the son of a millionaire he could really only complain so much, his childhood memories remained a mess of confusion and fear and insecurity that he liked to avoid thinking about whenever he could. He'd hated the lack of control and understanding that came with being a child, and that layered under his father's disappointment and anger and the fact he'd never fit in anywhere he'd tried to go... The idea that Chris not only knew all that but had seen it as entertainment in his comic books made Tony want nothing more than to push him away as far as he would go. Cute animatronic armor or no.

But he battened down on the impulse, because the man had come here to make amends after all.

Christian had, however, not-so-subtly ducked his question. "Forget about being thrilled to meet me. I can promise you, I rarely live up to the hype," Tony says, smiling slightly. Unthreateningly, he hoped. "But you said you were angry. Not scared, not lost, angry. Considering it was me you were angry at, I think I deserve to know why."
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#5
Tony's life hadn't been entertaining. It had been a balm, it had soothed frayed and exposed nerves, allowing a nine year old to weather bullies and foster homes and failure after failure, all while believing that things could, would, had to, get better.

“I was alone.” The admission was quiet, almost inaudible, but it was there, meant, maybe, for Tony to hear. Barely, uncertainly, but spoken, out loud, for what was maybe the first time. “You were…” Chris shook his head, unsure how to describe it, “Friendly?” He sighed, “I never knew my parents; they died before I could remember. I didn't make friends. It was…. that was why I liked you. You, the man in the comics, anyway, was just like me. But he was able to grow up, and become…. someone. The best.” And that was why he hadn't been able to tell Steve he was the best. Because that honor had always belonged to Tony Stark. And then to Safi.

And that was why Christian had been so angry.

You took the thing I wanted most in the world.

Instead of stating it so bluntly, Chris frowned, trying to find a safer way to express his feelings, to answer Tony’s question, “I am…. Odd. I know that.” He punctuated the statement with a tiny shrug, as though it was something even a blind man could clearly see. “Safi is…. My friend.” Singular, not ‘one of’ or ‘a’. Christian's friend. The only. Well, aside from Jonah, but if you made someone, they couldn't count, right? “Belle was lost. And I was…” Chris paused, reaching for the right words. “I was half out of my mind, terrified and desperate and he…” his face twitched, trying to stay calm, objective, but it was difficult, “And he stopped to flirt. With you.” And the hurt colored his voice. It had ceased being real anger a long time before, but it still stung. “It wasn't your fault. Of course he would like you. But…”. Chris shrugged again, this time the motion was attempting to be dismissive, “I was angry. I shouldn't have been. And it wasn't your fault. I know that.” He paused, then added almost hesitantly, "And then you weren't how I had expected... You were..." Chris wrung his hands, half in frustration and half from anxiety, "Different. And I just wanted you to be... Familiar. The way I knew you. Kind in a mean way. Like Safi was. And you... Weren't." And it had hurt. "Not your fault. I'm... I'm sorry."
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#6
Tony's brow furrowed as Chris started to explain. He hadn't actually spoken about his childhood, hadn't expected Chris to offer anything in that regard. Especially not to that degree.

Tony was, as a general rule, terrible at dealing with his own emotions. He knew this and so did everyone else. Other people's emotions were a slightly different story, but not by much. He was perceptive and he made an effort to show his friends that he cared. But a near-stranger bearing his soul to him, in clear need of comfort...or something...made him freeze up. He reflected, not for the first time, that machines were a lot easier to deal with than people.

"I'm not the best," Tony said after a moment. "Whatever else you believe about me, you should know that. But, uh..." he frowned. "I don't actually know what was in your comics. I don't know if it was right or not and to be honest, I'd rather not think about it. I'm sorry I didn't live up to your expectations."

As for the rest...

Tony let out a long sigh. Chris wasn't the only person who had a problem with his being with Safi, if for a very different reason. "Look. You don't have to apologize to me. As far as I'm concerned, there's no problem here."
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#7
No, Tony hadn’t really spoken of his childhood. But it had been on Christian’s mind, often, since Tony had denied what the comics had so blatantly shown. What had drawn a much younger Christian to Iron Man, no, to Tony Stark, in the first place.

Unlike Tony, Christian dealt with his emotions as best as he could, and he wasn’t all that terrible at it. Not because of the comic books, not because he had some magical ability to do it, but because he’d grown up alone, but surrounded by people and he’d always had to figure things out for himself, deal with his own problems and clean up his own messes, and he had had Belle to help him, to listen and clutch when he really truly needed her. Chris might need comfort, yes, yes he did, but he didn’t expect it, not from Tony Stark. No, what he needed from Tony was forgiveness and ideally, a new start. Comfort could be gotten from…

Somewhere else.

Chris didn’t even know where to go seek that. Who he could turn to for it. Not Safi, not for this. That… Wouldn’t feel right. But he would figure that out, and if he couldn’t, then it wouldn’t be the first time he’d had only himself for comfort. Far from.

When Tony claimed to not be the best, Christian snorted. “Of course you’d say that.” Chris looked at Tony, shaking his head, “Well, from what I can guess, they got the Extremis parts right. Technopathy, basically. Which is… I don’t even know. Crazy but cool?” Chris shrugged, “It doesn’t matter what was in the books, Tony.” It was the first time he’d called the man by his first name, and it was an unconscious thing; Chris didn’t even realize it. “You’re you. You’re here. I can, if you let me that is, get to know you. The real you. And that would be nice, because… Don’t think of it as not living up to my expectations. Because I shouldn’t have expectations for you to live up to. That’s wrong. Of me, of anyone who thinks that the idea of you they have in their head is more important than the person that you are.” Chris looked at Tony, brown eyes considering his words, “What I’d like most would be to have that chance. To maybe see if we can be friends. No expectations, just two people meeting and talking.”

Christian’s problem with Tony being with Safi was plain old jealousy. And he was bound and determined to figure out a way to make that not be a problem. “I didn’t have to, no, but I wanted to.” No problem here. Christian sighed, closing his eyes for a moment before he nodded and opened his eyes to give Tony a smile, “Thank you. Maybe we can start over then?”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#8
Tony frowned. "The comics you read as a child include Extremis?" He'd barely had Extremis for a year. If Chris knew all about it from his comics, it meant he'd seen much further into Tony's life than Tony had imagined. It was entirely possible he'd read about the superhero Civil War, some of the most trying and painful months in Tony's memory. The thought made him feel naked, made him wish he could pull his armor around himself and disappear. Had Chris read about Steve's death? Had he seen Tony's ugly breakdown or any of the rest? Maybe even past the point Tony had reached on his own timeline. Even the thought that comics for children would probably go light on all that wasn't reassuring, because they'd apparently had no trouble reporting on the other worst parts of his life. His voice was less steady than intended when he asked, "Just how much have you read about me?"

God, what if the comics had covered his feelings for Steve? Chris knew that Safi was his doppelgänger, and the two of them were best friends. If Chris had mentioned anything to him...

He was almost too shocked to register the rest of what Chris had said, but he responded after a moment. "Sure. Let's be friends." It probably came out a little more curt than he'd intended. "Start over, meet and talk, the whole deal. Like I said. I don't have any problem with you. Most people who hate me are a lot less polite about it... but you know that already, don't you?"
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#9
Chris made a face at the question, shifting slightly under Tony’s gaze. He didn’t like to admit that he still might pick up a comic book from time to time, mostly from nostalgia, but… Yeah, he’d kept up with some of the more recent storylines and… “Not… Exactly…” He sighed, “It was one of the later things, when I was older, but not… I was sixteen.” Chris shrugged, not really a child; hell, he’d been emancipated and living on his own at the time! But he definitely wasn’t an actual adult yet, either.

Looking down, Chris shrugged, “It doesn’t matter. Seems like they got most of it wrong.” He smiled a little bit, a fond expression, “They got Steve right, though. How’s it even possible that he’s better in real life than in the comics? Because he… Sorry… You’ve always been my favorite. It..” There had been more than once during the run of comics that Chris had broken down in tears because of what his hero had gone through. To Christian, Tony had been a real person, a friend and companion, something, someone, familiar to him as he grew up. “I read as much as I could get my hands on… Which… Wasn’t as much as I would have liked, getting money for comics wasn’t all that easy, but...I was able to keep with with the stories.”

Tony’s feelings for Steve? Oh, that was a whole can of worms that Chris could (but likely wouldn’t without at least a little bit of goading) open up. Because while the comics had never actually come out and addressed the odd tension between Tony and Steve, there were whole messes of people who got together and speculated about it. Tony and Steve, Tony and Pepper Potts, Tony and James Rhodes, Tony and Bucky (and uh, no). Steve and Tony, Steve and Bucky, Steve and Sharon, Steve and Wanda. But Chris? Christian was firmly rooted in the Stony portion of the fandom. Because he loved the two heroes, loved them together, and even growing up, he had been a little bit ‘off’ according to everyone. (In this instance ‘off’ meant that he was bisexual, even if he didn’t much like the label.) And he had made the connection that Safi and Steve looked an awful lot alike, and Tony was sleeping with Safi…

Which Christian hated. Hated. But that wasn’t his business. He was only friends with Safi, he reminded himself. Safi didn’t want anything else, wouldn’t even acknowledge it, because Safi wasn’t… Chris cut that thought process off savagely, his jaw clenching with the effort of it, just in time to hear Tony’s words. To hear his tone.

”Sure. Let’s be friends.”

Chris blinked at the sharpness of the agreement-not-agreement. Because yeah, that didn’t actually sound like someone who was looking to try to start over and be friends. Chris took a single step back and away, head ducking, “Sure, right.” His tone was subdued, shoulders held stiffly in good posture; he wouldn’t allow himself to crumble. Couldn’t. He was stuck in this situation, and he would not allow himself to muck it up again.

He could do this. He could do it right. He had to.

Chris frowned, “I know that a lot of people judge you harshly before they actually know you. And I know that people aren’t as polite as they should be, not just to you, but to everyone. I try to be polite, it’s how I was raised. And honestly, Mr. Stark? I’m not sure I know much of anything when it comes to you.” The reversion to the more formal address wasn’t a return the stiff niceties that Chris had been using with Tony since shortly after they’d met; this was… Different. Respectful. Formal, but obviously something within a comfort zone for Chris. He was beginning to address Tony the way he would a VP from Lexcorp, something he knew how to deal with rather than the disingenuous manners of someone he didn’t like, or the more easy familiarity of using the man’s first name. Retreat to something familiar and comfortable, but polite and socially acceptable. Chris had put himself out there, and Tony didn’t seem to be interested in actually being friends. This… Was maybe the next best thing that Chris figured he could hope for.
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#10
"Okay, 16, whatever," Tony said. The fact of the matter remained that this man had been reading about his very recent past at least ten years ago. He was both intrigued, because Chris had to have knowledge about Tony's future, and horrified, because while Tony found it easy to publicly condemn the man he'd been in his drinking days, he found it much harder to admit to people that he'd made his worst mistakes sober. And recently. The thought that anyone had a window into all of that, and moreover one that Tony couldn't possibly control, made his skin crawl. On the other hand, Chris seemed perpetually disappointed in him, so maybe the comics were more flattering than he was imagining.

"Like I said. I haven't seen these comics. I don't know how much they got right or wrong," he added shortly. He ignored the bit about being able to pay for them, because he'd found that short of handing out stacks of money there was little he could say or do to make anyone else feel better about their financial situation. The comment about Steve, though, made him give a low, sad chuckle. Of course, if Christian was any version of him, he'd be enamored with Steve too. "Cap's the best man I've ever known. Can't imagine any comic book would do him justice."

As he spoke, he realized what had been staring him in the face the whole time, and suddenly everything else about Chris seemed to click. Chris WAS enameled--with his own version of Steve. And all his animosity toward Tony probably came from the fact that Tony was sleeping with him. Regularly.

He didn't miss the slumping of the shoulders or the reversion to "Mr. Stark." His tone had been sharper than he'd intended earlier, but he actually had meant what he said. "Chris," he said slowly, trying to figure out how to fit what he'd just come to understand into the conversation without giving away his own untoward feelings. "We can be friends. Or, I think we can. This thing with Safi--you know it's not going anywhere, don't you? He and I were both very clear on that." (And if Tony had wondered fleetingly what it might be like if it did, well, that was something he was sure as hell going to keep to himself.)
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#11
Yeah, Tony had made some real whoppers of mistakes. But he also stuck around to fix those mistakes when he could, and he owned up to them no matter what. It was an admirable quality, really… And a heroic one, because doing that wasn’t easy. No, Christian didn’t try to emulate everything about Tony Stark; there were flaws and problems the man had that Chris tried to make sure he didn’t take on, of course. Instead, Christian had taken lessons from the mistakes Tony had made as often as he could, and tried to emulate the good parts of Tony, the parts that made him a hero, made him someone to be admired. Chris worked so hard to watch his drinking and make sure to communicate as well as he could. He tried not to lie. He owned his mistakes and flaws, and strove to be the best he could possibly be.

It had never occurred to him that the person he idolized the most would feel violated by the comic books. That the stories could be hurtful to consider people knowing about. Yes, Tony had faced many difficult and trying things, but Chris had ached with him, for him, along for the ride. He had shed tears over many of the events of the books, and his heart had swelled and ached at times. Sighing, Chris shrugged, “A lot happened in the comics. Hopefully some things were...exaggerated.” Chris blinked a few times as he considered it, and made no further mention of money; nowadays he was alright financially. Not as wealthy as Tony of course, but he did fine for himself. Hard work paid off. And the other Tony had given him ideas, too. Ideas that could make him much wealthier than he currently was if he could make them work.

As far as Steve…

Chris grinned fondly, “Cap is awesome.” The agreement was completely sincere, naturally, but… “You were always my favorite. Steve’s…” Chris shrugged, “Difficult. Difficult to imagine being like him, you know? Something to strive for, but remembering that you were probably gonna fail to be as good as him.” Tony? Tony was… Closer to real, at least for Chris. Someone you could imagine being your best friend, getting into trouble with. Steve would protect you from the bullies, but it was Tony who would know what to say to make him believe things would get better. “Yeah, no way. Because Steve? I’ve met him, and he’s… Way better than in the comics. I still don’t get how that’s even possible.” Steve made Chris think of Safi. Bigger than life, better than you could believe. “But I think I understand it. Hard to get something that perfect right when you’re not perfect.”

Tony hit the nail square on the head. Chris adored Safi; he didn’t even do the best job of hiding it. When Safi spoke, Chris listened. He obeyed, he didn’t even question Safi, not really. Steve had seen it immediately, and he had called Christian out on it, and Chris had… Well, he’d all but begged Steve not to tell Safi. And then the next day? Jaya had outed him to Safi.

Chris was still smarting from that whole mess. It had driven him here to make things better with Tony, a desperate hope to put things back together in a way that would hurt just a little bit less. If he could be friends with Tony, then maybe Safi would continue to pretend he hadn’t heard Jaya’s words. Maybe being friends with of them would make it easier to pretend that it didn’t feel like walking on coals. Maybe, just maybe, it would let Chris pick up the shattered pieces of his life and heart without slicing himself open even more.

Probably not. But it was worth the attempt. Mr. Stark spoke his name, and Christian looked up, bravely meeting the other man’s eyes. When Tony mentioned the ‘thing’ with Safi, and Christian went stiff, his posture perfect, eyes careful. He let Tony speak, and then it was his turn, and he kept his voice quiet and even, “Don’t hurt him, Tony.” Friends. Right. He could do this. The statement was a plea and a warning and a quiet threat all in one. “Do not hurt Safi. I will not forgive you if you do.” It was the singular line that no one could ever cross. Hurting Safi was the one thing you couldn’t do and be forgiven for. “I would like to be friends with you. I would love to be. But if you hurt Safi…” Christian’s expression shifted, and there it was; just a touch different, a little bit of hurt and pain coming through, and a whole lot of protectiveness. Christian was nonviolent, a pacifist to the core, but he had a drive to protect people, too, especially the ones he loved, and while he would never lay a hand on Tony or likely anyone else, that didn’t mean there was nothing he could do to retaliate should someone harm his friend. “Please. Don’t do that.”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#12
Tony grimaced, wondering if it would be better or worse if the comic stories were exaggerated. If they were, God knew what Chris thought he knew about him. If they weren't, well, Chris knew exactly how badly Tony had fucked everything up, but thought it too over the top to believe.

But he still insisted that Tony was his favorite. "You're probably right, can't capture perfection," Tony said, unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice. "Steve's a better man than me. Always was. I think he wished I'd tried a little harder to be like him." An image of Steve's face, disgusted at what he saw as Tony's latest moral failing, flashed in perfect clarity across his mental eye. All the times they'd clashed over the years, he'd thought Steve had at least understood where he was coming from. The SHRA mess has made him wonder if that had ever been true.

Chris froze at Tony's mention of Safi, like Tony thought he might. But Tony had to work to keep the hurt off his own face. Not because Chris had immediately assumed Tony was going to hurt Safi, though he wasn't exactly happy about the fact... but because with Steve's final hatred fresh in his mind it seemed far from impossible. His relationship with Steve had been toxic, why shouldn't this one be too.

"What makes you think I would hurt him?" Tony asked, keeping his tone even--a simple request for information. "Like I said, it's completely casual. Not like he's given me the keys to his heart here."
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#13
Chris had no idea if the stories he had read were just the truth, or if they had been exaggerated for dramatic or entertainment purposes. But Tony’s mistakes had never made Christian feel any less for the man. Tony Stark was still Iron Man, and he was still a hero, Christian’s favorite hero. Especially because he was so very human.

Chris blinked, and then shook his head slightly, “Steve isn’t perfect, Tony.” The brunette reached out, as though to touch, to comfort the other man, before the movement was aborted. Tony wouldn’t appreciate it, not he were anything like how the comics said he was. Instead, Chris looked at him, brown eyes steady and honest, “In some ways, yes, Steve is better. But he made mistakes, too. He should have listened more sometimes, and he should have made different decisions sometimes. The comics told me that, but so did he, in person, not all that long ago.” Chris gave Tony a small but heartfelt smile, “But you’re you, and honestly?” Chris shrugged and looked to the floor, blushing just a little bit, “You being you is why I liked you best.” Because the mistakes that Tony made? Were always for the right reasons. Even when Christian disagreed with Tony, he still liked Tony. “I haven’t always agreed with you, but I have always respected why you do the things you do. Or at least, in the comics.”

Of course Chris froze when Tony brought Safi up. Of course he did, because that, everything to do with Safi was just… A mess. A horrible, jumbled, painful mess. Chris frowned at Tony’s question, shaking his head, “I don’t think you’d want to, or try to.” But being involved with Tony Stark was risky for the not-Tony-Stark person. Chris sighed, shoulders slumping, “But he’s Safi, Tony…” As though that explained everything, but...maybe it did, because… Safi.

Completely casual. No keys to his heart.

Christian fidgeted. He didn’t like this topic, and honestly, wished he could drop it, but Tony obviously wanted answers. “Right. And if it stays that way, then maybe you’re right, no one would get hurt.” Because Chris could be objective, right? Riiiiight…. “But you’re you, and he’s… Safi. And…” Christian’s expression turned pleading, “He deserves to be happy.”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#14
"Perfect is...relative," Tony said. Of course, he and Steve had disagreed plenty of times over the years. Steve could be shortsighted, could place ideas over people and over reality. But Steve's dogged idealism was part of what made him so exceptional.

He noticed Chris's aborted movement toward him, but couldn't think what to make of it. Had the younger man been reaching to comfort him? For a moment he couldn't imagine how he would know how deeply Tony had mourned Steve, was still mourning him...but then that sick sense of vulnerability returned as he realized that of course he knew. It had to be obvious enough in his comics, like everything else about Tony's life.

"Cap made mistakes. But he was still the best man I've ever known. The day we found him in the ice...best day of my life," Tony said seriously, then wondered if Chris knew that already too. "And I'm about as far from perfect as you can get," he added. If anything made him more uncomfortable than the insight Chris apparently had into his life, it was the fact that he still saw Tony as some kind of hero.

Except when it came to Safi, apparently. Tony narrowed his eyes at Chris, trying to understand what exactly he was saying. He'd neither confirmed nor denied his interest in Safi, which made Tony think it was either one of those things that would remain unspoken forever, or maybe he'd already tried and been shot down. He also seemed to think that Tony's fling with him was likely to go somewhere more casual than it already was, and considering how well he knew Safi...maybe he knew something Tony didn't. The entreaty to make Safi happy, well, that implied he was expecting something to happen. Or maybe he just thought Tony needed the warning. What did "you're you" mean anyway?

This was why Tony had always found it easier to understand machines.

"He does," Tony agreed after a moment. "Deserve to be happy, I mean. You know, for what it's worth--" not that it could be worth much, given his track record with significant others and promises and everything else, "--I promise you. I'll be good to him."
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#15
Christian looked at Tony. Relative. “Perfect is Sa-” He shifted, frowning as he cut off the statement, “Perfect is perfect. It’s an opinion, maybe, but… I think Steve would dislike being called perfect. He’s… Human, Tony. And that’s why I like him. Because he can make mistakes, and own up to them. Because he doesn’t think he’s perfect.” He offered the other man a smile, “It’s why I like you, too. Because yeah, sure, you mess up, because you’re human, and humans do that. But you mean well, you want to do good, and you keep trying, regardless of failure. You don’t let it stop you.” He paused, then shrugged, “At least, in the comics. And seeing as we’re only right now actually trying to get to know each other, that’s all I had to go on when I was younger.” He smiled, eyes warm and almost liquid, “Sorry. I know it’s not fair to think of you from those, because they’re probably very inaccurate. I’ll try to not make assumptions, because people do that enough to me, and I don’t like it. Can’t imagine you do, either.”

Of course Christian had been moving to comfort him. Because even if Tony Stark didn’t care about Steve Rogers the way Chris had always imagined, they had still been very good friends. Close enough to try to work through things even when they were at odds. Enough to put things back to right afterwards. And losing your best friend? That… Christian’s breath caught in his chest, pulling a shudder from the smaller man. And Tony had to be suffering a loss of Cap in some form or another, because he referred to Steve in the past tense. Made, was… The tense usage spoke volumes. When Tony confided that finding Cap had been the best day of his life, Chris looked up, blinking at Tony and offering a small, painful smile of his own, “I know what that’s like. That kind of… Fullness?” He nodded, remembering the moment when Safi had gone from being an acquaintance to safe. Chris shifted, murmuring, “There’s that moment when you realize you’re safe, and that it’s… It’s okay, it’s good.”

Safi was something unique. This whole mess… Christian was desperately trying to make things...livable. Because right now, he wasn’t sure how long his heart could stay seized the way it was before it just gave up. And that’s what it felt like. Like his heart was mid-beat, and not going anywhere, refusing to finish the motion.

The words about Safi deserving happiness had been meant more as a reminder to himself, a plea to remember, to keep in mind what Safi wanted, not what Christian wanted. Because it would be so easy to be selfish. So easy to try to chase Tony away. But if Tony made Safi happy… Then he deserved that. And who wouldn’t like Tony? He was… Tony Stark. He was him, and that was what Christian had meant, of course. A compliment. After all, he’d only just said that Tony being himself was why Chris had been drawn to him in the first place.

Tony’s echo of Safi’s worthiness of happiness earned a cringe from Christian, who ducked his head, “I know he does.”

...for what it’s worth… I promise you. I’ll be good to him.”

Christian’s head snapped up, eyes flashing. Tony had known the small man long enough to know that Chris was a pacifist, that he refused to do violence on another, but that didn’t mean he didn’t get damn protective of the people he loved. His sister, Safi… He would protect them the best ways he could. “Of course you will be.” the words were soft, understanding, but firm, certain. And then Christian’s face fell and he shrugged, “I know you will be. Just…” He sighed. In one fell swoop he had lost his heart and hope for his favorite pairing.

Today was just going swimmingly.

Belle was going to hate him when she got back from her quest and he had to tell her that there was just no way Stony was a thing. Because as much as Tony seemed to grieve Steve (even with Steve right there in the mansion!), he was with Safi now, and didn’t seem to be interested in Captain America.

Maybe Steve needed a hug or ten. Tony might not like comfort, but Steve… Steve definitely seemed like maybe he was a hugger, and Chris knew that he could certainly use a whole lifetime of them right now. “Thank you. For taking the time, Tony. I really appreciate it, I know you have to be busy.”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#16
"Of course he doesn't think he's perfect. He wouldn't be Steve if he wasn't also infuriatingly humble," Tony said. He pressed his lips together at Chris's assessment of his own life and failures, then sighed. As much as he hated the idea that Christian knew everything about him, there were very few people--especially in the past few months--who had had such a charitable view of his failures. It was actually a little refreshing, after trying futilely to convince the whole rest of the world that his intentions regarding the SHRA, at least, had always been good. "But, ah... thanks. I guess."

“I know what that’s like. That kind of… Fullness? There’s that moment when you realize you’re safe, and that it’s… It’s okay, it’s good.”

And with that, Tony went right back to feeling ill at ease. He didn't want Chris's sympathy. Especially not when, comics or not, he clearly didn't understand what Steve had meant to him. It had never been about safety, with Steve. Being Iron Man, being an Avenger, had never been safe, especially back in the early days when his heart had always been on the verge of failure. And his feelings for Steve had been so wrapped up in all of that from the beginning that it was impossible to think of Steve as "safe." Even...emotionally...Steve had never been much of a safe harbor, since he'd never been afraid to tell Tony exactly what he thought of him.

"No. It was never about that," he murmured. It had been about Steve's kindness and strength and and selflessness and conviction, and Tony had to swallow down a wave of sadness because all of that was lying cold and dead under the ice in the Arctic.

Still, the funny thing was, Tony knew what safety felt like, because Safi radiated it without even seeming to try. And really, who else could Chris be talking about?

Then Chris was thanking him for his time and preparing to make a hasty exit.

"Wait," Tony said. It had seemed clear enough from the outset that Safi wasn't interested in Chris, not in that way. It had been Safi, after all, who had started flirting with Tony right in front of him. Still, it was becoming obvious that that wasn't the whole story, and Tony was a firm believer in knowing what he was getting into. At the very least, he might tread more cautiously if he knew of potential emotional entanglements on either end. "You and Safi. Is there something there that I should know about?"
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#17
Infuriatingly humble. Yeah, okay… Except that Steve had a tendency to not realize when he was wrong, always taking it for granted that he was right, that his point of view was the correct point of view. And that… “True. But he needs you to be his foil or he gets just a little bit too stuck in his own head. Just like you need him to let you know when you’re taking a wrong turn. Maybe.” Tony’s continued resistance that the comic books didn’t have things right had Christian reluctant to commit to any statement that made assumptions about either man or their relationship or adventures. “You’re welcome?” Chris blinked at Tony before asking quietly, almost nervously, “For what, though?”

Christian wasn’t really speaking of Tony and Steve anymore. Not...really. No, he was speaking of Safi, which was dangerous. So, so dangerous… But he couldn’t help it. Safi was safe.

Thing was, though, that Chris viewed Steve and Tony as safe for each other. No, they never balked to call each other out when they were wrong, but they picked each other back up, spent entire fights watching out for one another, and always came back together at the end. Even after…

He hated those comics. Oh, they were excellent, but the ending? And then after... He’d set them down then, unable to read something so heartbreaking…

When you were driven to pray for comic book characters, you knew it was a problem.

“You were good for each other, you know… Complimentary, even when you were butting heads.” And he needed to stop, because, “I’m sorry. I know it’s not all right, what I read, but it… I felt like I knew you, both of you, and this? This is hard. Especially seeing how much they got wrong.” Which was, apparently, all of Tony’s backstory. Yep, time to go. Time to find something to do, someone else to annoy for a bit…

"Wait.”

Damn it. Chris turned to look at Tony again, brown eyes full of caution, “Hm?”

Something...there? That Tony should know about...him and Safi? Several emotions flitted across Christian’s features, one right after the other; surprise, concern, worry, fear, and then finally pain, which lingered the most before Christian looked down, shoulders slumping. He felt smaller than he ever had, even growing up, his posture shifting almost as though to protect himself, to make himself smaller, a smaller target, don’t look at me, I’m not a threat… “...No?”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#18
Tony honestly didn't know what to make of Chris telling him why he and Steve needed each other. It wasn't that he was wrong...far from it, actually, which was if possible even weirder than the factual information Chris had.

"Little too late for all of that," he said tightly. Cap hadn't listened to sense, hadn't listened to Tony, at any point during the last year. Stuck in his own head was one way to put it. "I just meant, uh, thanks for...giving me the benefit of the doubt. Not many people have lately." He made a slightly sour face at the thought, then shook his head as Chris went on.

He still didn't want Chris's sympathy. Sympathy meant acknowledging, if only to himself, that he was not okay and was not going to be okay. Really, it would be a lot easier to let Chris think his comics had gotten that wrong too. "Sounds like these comics of yours like their drama," he said lightly. What was one more person with the wrong impression of him? He'd cultivated worse public personas, and he'd been denying his true feelings for Steve for more than a decade. (Though he did feel a little stab of guilt at starting off their new friendship with another lie, no matter how necessary it was.)

Chris's face seemed to dance through a variety of expressions before he folded in on himself, looking sad. Which said plenty in and of itself. Still, his answer meant that even if Chris was carrying a torch for Safi--which seemed likely enough--Tony shouldn't feel guilty about letting their thing go where it would go. "Great," he said a little awkwardly. It was hard not to think about how it had been to watch Steve date other people, though Tony had never faulted him for it. Not when him reciprocating Tony's feelings had seemed impossible anyway. "So...no hard feelings, then?"
Reply
DC-DCTVU-1

289 Posts
14 Threads
Age:29
Job: PA/Magician
Ship Status: Single with Complications
Sexual Orientation: Pan-Romantic
Nyte

All Accounts Posts: 845
Points: 4,793.49€
#19
This was why he needed to keep in mind that the comics were obviously wrong, because while they seemed to get Steve pretty darn right, they had made...mistakes...with Tony. His background, how he felt about Steve… It was all wrong, and Christian actually resented the writers for messing it all up, for ruining all of it. When Tony said something from the comic wasn’t true, Christian believed him, because at the end of the day, Tony Stark was still his hero.

”Little too late for all of that.”

Christian blinked at the words, frowning, “What do you mean, too late?” There were things that narrowed down when in the timeline Tony was from… Like the fact that he had the Extremis… But Christian wasn’t sure what he was referring to, not exactly, and he was reluctant to make any assumptions or guesses, having been wrong enough about the man before him, thank you, stupid writers getting things wrong. “More people should, then. Give you the benefit of the doubt, I mean.”

Drama. Christian made a face at the word, “More like heartache, but…” He shrugged, “At a certain point I just… Stopped reading for a while. I couldn’t…” Chris shook his head before shrugging, trying to dismiss just how deeply he’d been affected by comic books. Because that, he knew, wasn’t normal, and made him pathetic. And while it might be true, he really didn’t need Tony thinking so. Still, his face twisted into anger for a moment, “And screw them for that, too, because why’d they have to lie? Kids don’t need to see-read- those things. That wasn’t entertainment, that was...” Heartbreak. He huffed, then sighed, “Sorry. I guess they like to make things darker and sadder than need be. Not a good feeling, though, to find out that even though you’re real, the stories were just…stories.” It would be like finding out that Ghandi was a warmonger… It hurt, though Chris tried to brush it off.

The question about him and Safi, though… He had no right to stop Tony from being with Safi, no claim to make; Safi knew how he felt, and had decided to ignore it. It was better than being turned out to find a new place to live, to be alone again, but it still hurt. Tony caught the look, of course he did, because he was a genius, and Chris gave him the best smile he was capable of (and if it were just a little bit broken and didn’t quite reach his eyes, could he really be blamed?) and nodded, “No hard feelings, Tony. Just glad to get off on the right foot this time.”
Reply
Marvel-616

171 Posts
4 Threads
Age:35
Job: Director of SHIELD
Ship Status: Open to shipping
Sexual Orientation: Sure, with just about anyone (but I don't want to write it explicitly)
Jasmine (starkly-tony)

All Accounts Posts: 251
Points: 1,864.72€
#20
Tony gave a derisive snort. "It's a little too late for me and Cap to be the perfect foils for each other. He wouldn't listen to me, and now he's dead." He knew he sounded bitter but couldn't help himself. If only Steve had been willing to compromise... if only Tony had found a better way to get through to him. He'd been trying hard over the past few weeks to distract himself, but the memories were still as raw and painful as they'd been months ago.

He shook his head at Chris's insistence that he was a good man, aware that his expression had tightened into something painful. He was smart, had seen how all the pieces would align (well, most of them), and had seen what it was necessary for him to do for the good of everyone... but that had entailed selling his soul. As much as he longed for the kind of acceptance Chris was offering, it was hard to argue that he actually deserved it.

"Heartache?" he said aloud. He was surprised at Chris's emotion as he implied that Tony's life had been too painful for him to read about, and even more so at his anger. "What stories are you talking about, exactly?" Tony asked. It was a morbid curiosity, maybe, but assuming the comics were as accurate as they seemed to be... he just had to know. He wondered distantly if Chris had even read through Steve's death, since it was hard to imagine anything more heartbreaking.

He returned Chris's stiff smile with a forced smile of his own. "Getting off on the right foot. Sure. I'm glad to hear it."
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)

theme created by Gotham's Reckoning at Necessary Evil. Powered By MyBB, © 2002-2017 MyBB Group.
RPG Initiative Topsites RPG-D
Hello, guest!
or Register?